People can turn just about anything into a „sport”. Which is exactly why we have such breath taking exhibitions of the human spirit as championships of Beer Pong, Rock-Paper-Scissors or Fast Texting (aka Fasting). I remember way back when me and my friends were watching that episode of My Name is Earl where he enters into the Grocery Bagging Competition to help some pour shmoe out because he murdered his aunt or something (I could be making this up though) and then one of my mates turned to me and said “I know this is fiction and everything but, I gotta tell you, those Yanks will be turn anything into a sport. Just you see, next year we will see championships in competitive taking a dump”. As much as I did agree with him back then and since (except the fictional part, nothing so magical can be fake. I believe in you Earl, keep up the good work), I must admit ‘Merica is not the only place swarming with bizarre pass times. You might have already guessed that this is going to be another “Japan is a weird place and thinking about it gives me a headache” type of deals. So stretch your thumbs and get ready to enter the fascinating world of Puchi Puchi Tsubushi.

First, a little show of hands. Who enjoys popping bubble wrap? The heavenly fragile cargo wrapper with its little packets of air in yard long rolls ready to be popped with an unmistakable grin of satisfaction and a touch of insanity. One of the ultimate time killers there is, responsible for accumulated millennia of procrastination, miles better than pot. Bubble wrap popping is way cheaper, available to anyone, has zero harmful side effects to the body, can be enjoyed by pregnant women and is above all legal. Who needs pot when you have bubble wrap?!

- Hey kid, wouldn’t you rather smoke a joi…
- NO!

But here is the thing… is it a sport? Apparently it is in Japan.

Bubble wrap popping is big here, even though so few actually acknowledge it. The bastard even has its own Wikipedia page (Japanese only, sorry). The game, which in Japanese is called Puchi Puchi Tsubushi, literally means “Smashing [Something] Soft”, not unlike a nice Boob Fondle, and is described on the Wiki as a stress relieve slash concentration game-like exercise, but honestly, some might be inclined to think that the Japanese are taking it a tad too seriously.
For example… not only were the effects of PPT researched at actual psychological centers, they even managed to dedicate an entire TV show episode to it. In 2004, “Homunculus, the Mysteries of the Mind and Body”, have shared their fascinating research results with the country concerning bubble wrap popping, including both its history and psychological aspects. What did they learn from it?
- 2 year old kids who never saw bubble wrap before instinctively started to pop it once they they’ve seen it;
- Chimpanzees are also fans of PPT;
So what does that tell us? That we require about as much cerebral stimulation in our entertainment as primates for one, which I have to tell you, explains so fucking lot to me, mainly the bulk of TV and pop music today.

So OK… the Japanese apparently really like popping bubble wrap. Not like that is anything particularly strange, we all have our quirks, right? Yeah… did I mention the Japanese have actually invented different types of Play for PPT? With rules and everything? Here they are:
- Hold the Bubble Wrap Sheer and pop the bubbles one by one using 2 fingers,
- Put the sheet on a flat hard area and pop the bubbles with 1 finger,
- Roll the sheet like a piece of cloth and pop a large number of bubbles at once,
- Fold the sheet as much as you can and step on it!
- Smash large areas of the sheet with your elbow or knee.
You got to hand it to them; once the Japanese start obsessing about something they do not half-ass around with it. Which is also why the good people here have solved the main problem with the fun activity of PPT. Where to get all that bubble wrap? Who actually buys this stuff? Usually you just need to get a fragile letter or start working for a moving company, secretly un-wrapping the Brown’s precious porcelain china and keeping the sweet bubbly goodness for yourself. Well, your petty felony days are over, because Japan is proud to present the electronic Puchi Puchi Tsubushi Machine.

Oh hell yes. This little baby is 8 soft buttons of stress relief designed to give off a random sounds (including dog bark and doorbell) whenever you pop a 100 of these suckers… I just realized how horribly retarded that sounds. But anyway, this handy little conversation started is no bigger than 2 inches at all sides (which means you can carry it with you at all times), comes in a variety of colours and totally gets you the ladies. I once took it out in a bar, got 20 phone numbers that very night. The ladies like a man who knows how to make them relax. Thanks Japan!

Tagged with: bubble • pop

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